July 18, 2008

Holy Rollers

This is one important piece of leftover business from PEI. In Charlottetown, the capital, sits St. Dunstan's Basilica, an imposing structure of Roman Catholicism. Inside the front door is a sign with warnings and prohibitions (a Catholic specialty:)

"Proper attire required.

"No food or drink"

"No Inline Skating"

What? No inline skating??? I am glad that I did not drag my rollerblades all the way up here. I would have been so disappointed. What about heely's? Heely's are those sneakers with wheels built into the heels. Would they be allowed?

I wonder who has been sneaking into the church and skating laps up and down the aisles. Would that be a venial or mortal sin? It would be a convenient venue because they could go to confession right after the workout.

I think that St. Dunstan's is being short sighted. This is a big church we are talking about and it is a long way from back to front. Think about how they could boost their line for the eucharist by allowing people to skate up from their pews! And it would make the mass go faster too!

Finally, I notice how only "inline" skating is prohibited. There is no similar ban for hockey skates. This is Canada after all. I wonder if you can bring your hockey stick to church too. Now church is starting to look like fun!

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